Healthy toddlers Archives | Well Nourished

Developing toddlers healthy eating habits

So by 12 months you’ve introduced a variety of foods and largely ruled out any food intolerance (though please continue to watch for any intolerance if a new food is introduced). These posts will help you with food introduction, here and here.

At this point, toddlers should be starting to eat more or less the same meals as you are, either roughly pureed if this is still their preferred texture or cut into little pieces. There is no need to make special meals for them, in fact, this is developmentally detrimental! Research confirms what I know to be true – children who eat the same meals as their parents have healthier diets. Read more on this here.

Your toddler will by now understand the meaning of food and all that’s involved in the process of eating. It is also the time when they will challenge you and their eating habits will become a bit erratic.

I have treated thousands of children in over 18 years of clinical practice, and it is almost always during these early years that poor eating habits and food fussiness develop. Prevention is always much easier than cure, so over the next few posts, I will discuss some basic guidelines for forming healthy eating habits in toddlers and some hurdles to avoid (yes they will have you jumping them at some point).

But first – the type of tantrum to be proud of…

It’s my husbands birthday so we go to a very quiet French Restaurant in the country for lunch (we didn’t expect it to be so quiet)! Yikes I thought, as we sat at our table. My daughter was 2 years old at the time and fairly well behaved at the table and even at that stage, just loved food and trying new things. My husband ordered snails and natural oysters as an entrée (gross to me), and shared them with miss 2. What we didn’t plan for was that they were finished all too quickly and not understanding that that was just the first course, miss 2 started wailing ‘I want more snails and oysters!’ Thankfully, the other patrons appreciated her palate and found the outburst quite entertaining!

Kids aren’t ‘just fussy’.

They develop food fussiness and it is something you have complete control over. I’m not saying they won’t have likes and dislikes – that’s normal. But many children dislike many more foods than they like (or will only eat processed foods like pasta and bread) and this is an issue. My mother-in-law had 7 kids in 8 years and my husband came 10 years later. There was no food fussiness in that family though one child was a very small eater (and still is – just the way he is).

Food habits, like any habit, are formed, not inherent. I generally frustrate the hell out of mums of fussy kids when I say this. But I know raising my own two whole food loving kids, as well as helping many families ‘turn around’ their kids fussy eating habits, that this is absolutely true (unless there is a medical reason underlying).

Meal time routine

It is very easy to slip into the habit, especially busy mums with other kids, to supply toddlers with a constant stream of snacks. I know the food might keep them busy for a while but it seriously sabotages long-term healthy eating habits. If you give your bub food all day long, you can’t expect them to sit still or enjoy a meal come meal times. For more on kids and snacking, see this post here.

I hope you’ve developed a bit of structure around meal times by this stage…this is really important. Their food routine needs to include sitting at the family dinner table (or bench). I know this is sometimes difficult for a wiggly toddler and this is all the more reason to make sure they are very hungry come meal time. But this is one rule that later down the track will make your life so much easier; a bit of short term pain for long term gain.

Ask any mum of older kids (that aren’t strapped in) how stressful it is to have kids up and down from the table like yo-yo’s. It is distracting and takes the pleasure from enjoying meals in public or on holidays. I’ve heard it all – from kids only eating if sitting ‘in the kitchen sink’ to them ‘being force fed a mouthful of dinner during each add break in return for letting them watch their favourite TV show.’ Which brings me to one of the most important yet so simple tip…

Family meals matter

Sharing a meal with your toddler is just so important and this is why you need to work towards them eating the same meal as you. I can’t emphasise strongly enough how important this is for both nutritional and social development. I have gone into great detail about this in many of the posts on my website starting with “Family meals matter” (in ways you may never have considered).

If you prefer to eat with your husband or partner later in the evening, then, at least, dish yourself a small portion of dinner and sit with your toddler. Then also make an effort at weekends to eat a few of your meals (breakfast, lunch or dinner) together as a family.

Lead by example

Eat what you want them to eat. Children follow your example, not your advice. If you don’t want them to eat processed foods, then just don’t buy them. In the case of processed foods, what they don’t know won’t hurt them and what they do know will.

Once they have a taste for sweet processed foods, it’s hard to go back. My first born was given lollipops and chocolate bunnies at Easter often, but because she didn’t know what was inside, she just thought they were pretty little things to be carried around. Of course that all changed once she peeled back that wrapper!

Part two will be along soon. How are your toddlers food habits developing?

New and changing tastes

Every child is different and their needs, likes, and dislikes are constantly evolving, as is their appetite. This is often frustrating for parents and makes our lives with kids all the more tricky. But this is NORMAL so don’t let it become a source of stress. Research indicates a new food may need to be offered 8 or more times before a toddler will accept it.

I could list pages of foods my 5 and 9 years old loved when they were little and now hate (and vice versa). That is why it is so important to always offer and encourage them to give all foods a try. As they get older (and for very stubborn children) reward charts are great – they don’t have to eat it all, just try it. Persist, persist and then persist a little more!

It took me 3 years of putting salad leaves on both of my kids plates before they happily began to eat (and ask for leaves). My son used to pick up the leaves and say ‘don’t like flowers’, to which I’d respond (trying to mask my frustration), ‘they are leaves, not flowers.’ But he’d throw them over onto my plate regardless.

Don’t fret when they fuss

Easier said than done, and I understand I have the benefit of hindsight here. But know this…your toddler will not always eat what you want them to eat when you want them to eat it. Their appetite will also vary enormously from day to day, week to week. Even now, sometimes my kids eat a lot, other days only a little. Accept this and don’t let it get to you! Until they can communicate with you, you will find this frustrating. But you have no choice but to honour their needs. Trying to force feed or coerce your toddler into eating is pointless. Their bodies know best. They may just not be hungry so by coercing them to eat you are teaching them that they should eat even when they are not hungry. They may be feeling off colour or teething so food is not appealing. They may feel too tired to eat. Whatever the cause, try, try again then leave it with them to decide when they are hungry.

Offer them a variety of whole foods, but if they reject them, leave them be. Whatever you do, don’t offer them processed or sugary foods to satisfy yourself that they have “eaten something.” More harm than good comes from this.

When they are sick

Sickness is a time, in my experience that many bad eating habits are formed. I can’t tell you how many chronically unwell children I have treated who have developed serious sugar addictions and terrible eating habits (which has made them even more sick ironically), whilst sick.

Sickness is a time to pay even more attention to your child’s eating habits, not give into demands for treat foods. If your child doesn’t have an appetite when sick, then just provide them with lots of fluids and support them. I find coconut water goes down well (and is isotonic) and most importantly a bone broth to drink or use as a stock for a soup is so very healing. Read more about bone broth (and a recipe) here. I always have a supply of jars of broth in my freezer for an immune and nutritional boost when required. You can always add a little rice or even rice noodles if that’s what they feel like (i.e.; chicken noodle soup).

Finally, follow their lead but also stay somewhat in control. They will only eat nutritionally inadequate foods if that’s what you provide them. Their little bodies need more nutrition for growth and repair during toddlerhood more than ever. What an amazing gift for your child – to provide them with healing, nourishing foods and develop a lifelong appreciation of whole foods.

Please feel free contribute some of your experiences (or frustrations) by posting a comment below.

Developing Healthy Eating Habits in a Toddler – Part One